Fourteen

[Writer's note: Still a part of the notebook lost and found today, March 11, 2012, together with the two compositions posted prior to this one. Dated sometimes in February 2008, I've written this one for HER ^_^". I don't know but I'm pretty sure I've handed her a copy of these. Also, posted for preservation.]

Fourteen

Crescent schyte of the crescent moon sliced through your pain,

Having the hovering stars, silence out your words.

Rays of the beaming moonlight tells to lay back, 

In the coulds you'll sleep tonight, blessed by heaven's luck.

Slowly close your eyes, and cast the nightmares away,

Tonight, happy dreams and worlds stays with you I wish.

In them you are the queen, princess, and the damsel,

Nested in a big sweet sugar coated castle.

Every step, every dance, I wish I am with you,

Remove the agony for you to always smile.

Everyday of any time to be beside you,

On your feet I bow, and live another day new.

Dreamer I am and in dreams only you can see,

I, who is your servant, your clown, and your army.

Covered by clouds, I'm the moon your midnight sunshine,

As you dream tonight, let's fly to dreamland shall we?

For Aia

† One Sunday afternoon, the family decided to clean the house up. A general cleaning was being executed for dumping the old stuff that's been stored for ages. Then somewhere, I was to throw this old notebook that looks like my niece's grade 4 notes. Thinking that it's still important, I flipped the pages and saw this writings. I was amazed to see 3 compositions having a short story ( really really short ) that was written in connection to the next composition, a sonnet; and a poem which I allegedly written dated way back 2008. I remembered somewhere in my lifetime (also somehow stated in the short short story) I stopped writing. Maybe, I may consider this one to be one of the reason for me to write again. And I'm putting this here for preservation. Hah! I might have lost  this one forever. †

*******

[Heartbeat]

"... so cold..."

[Heartbeat]

[Sound] [Beeep.... beeeep... beeeep]

"It's dark... where am I?"

  When my senses came back, I found myself  walking in a corridor with yellow dim lights. I continued  walking hoping I'll be able  to get to the end. A couple of steps more and  I saw a door. Curious, I observed.  Reached for the knob and turned the door open. And a stream of light  slices through the yellow dim light that my eyes, blinded by the bright light, shut close.

  "For the second time, you're late." the man on the room said.

  "Late? for what? Where am I?  Who are you?" I asked hurriedly. 

  "Yes, you are late! for what? For an interview; Who am i? The interviewer; for what -- "  He paused and get a couple of questionnaires  on top of a table in the middle of the room. The only table in there I saw.

  "-- It's for me to know and for you to find out." He continued.

  I gazed at the room. It's more of a preschool classroom. Letters of the alphabet on the walls, numbers, blackboard, and pictures of different things. I walked near on the window and saw a beach and gentle wind soothes up my face. Peaceful.

"Are you ready?" the interviewer asked.

"Huh?"

"Are you not listening? Are you ready?"

"For what?" I asked back.

"For the interview! Geesh!" he answered irritated.

"Why should I take this interview? what for?"

"Because the boss asked for it"

"Who is the boss?" I asked.

"First question: Who are you in the four mask you're wearing?" he ignored what I'm asking.

"I am the four mask... I only -- HEY!!" I stopped because I was really surprised by the question.

" --  How did you know about the masks? who are you?" I followed.

"I don't know about the masks... the boss do." He explained.

"Who is the boss?"

"I'm the one who's asking questions here" He said calmly.

"You don't really talk about the masks... don't you?" He continued.

"No, I don't. But I'm able to talk about it with others selectively."

"Why?" he asked.

"I don't know. Maybe it just unlocks somethings about me that I myself don't know."

"Do you believe in fairytales?" He questioned.

"Does this doesn't look like one?"

"This is the truth, boy. There's nothing fairytale-ish in here." He explained.

  Then suddenly, I heard whispers.

"Wait! Do you hear that?"

"Hear what?" The interviewer asked.

"The whispers."

"It's normal in here."

"Why do I hear these things suddenly?"

"The whispers  are here since the first time you touched the knob and opened the door. You just don't listen."

"But why?"

"It's a connection of you and the boss. Somehow, you got to hear the words that you shared, talked and listened."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"How?" I asked amazingly.

"I don't know." He said.

After a couple of seconds,  the whispers came back. 

"There it is again." I said.

"Try to listen -- " He told me. "-- That's the boss reading a poem."

"It's a sonnet. A literary form with 14 lines."

"Whatever. You know too much." The interviewer was annoyed.

"The sonnet is nice." said I.

"I know why."

"Why?"

"Because it's yours. You wrote it for the boss. You wrote it  for her." He said.

"I did? or did I?" I asked surprisingly.

"Yes, you did."

"But I don't write anymore. Not in a long period of time."

"That's what makes it nicer. She made you write again."

The interviewer smiled at me. 

"Where are we?"

"Inside the boss' mind."

"Really? So, she's thinking of me?"

"Some of the time. And this moment is somehow part of that 'some of the time'. And as you've guessed it right,  this interview is about you. She's trying to know you, you know?"

Again, I gazed at the room and observe.

"Your boss' mind is a little bit childish."

"No, it is not."

"But what about the alphabet and the pictures and the colorful shape --"

"That's the same thing the boss asked when I got to interview her when she is in your mind."

"My mind?"

"Yes, your mind." He confirmed.

"You get to interview her inside my mind? Do I think of her too?" I'm puzzled.

"Oh, sure --" he said fine. " -- you both have a childish part in you still." He continued.

"Oh no, no. Your boss is what? 18? 19 years old and still have this alphabets and dolls and fairytale books in here?"

"And you are 25 and still, my boss, saw  pictures of Bugs Bunny, Road Runner, and Mighty Mouse in your mind."

I got quiet.

"What's your boss' name?" I asked.

  The interviewer answered but I was not able to catch the name for the whispers joins the interviewer's voice when he utters the name. But somehow, I recalled the piece I have written... the name is in there. Somehow, the piece is owned by the name and the name is the piece.

"What are you thinking?" he asked.

"This is your boss' mind, is this?"

"Yes, this is."

  I picked a chalk and write something in the board. When I finished the writings, the interviewer asked something.

"What did you do?"

"This is you boss' mind, right? So, I wrote a message. And the message will stay here. Since she think of me some of the time, she will be able to read the message I left her mind." I explained thouroughly.

"But I don't see the message you've written." He said with a confused voice.

"You're not the boss. It's for me to know and for her to find out."

[Whispers]

"I think I need to go." I said.

"It's okay. The interview is done." He replied.

"Did your boss get to know all the things she wanted to know?"

"No. But this wouldn't be the last time we will meet." He smiled.

"I understand. How do I get out of here?"

"You don't. You will stay here as long as the boss wants."

[Whispers]

[Heartbeat]

[Reality]

"Hey! Wake up! your phone is beeping"

"Oh! Sorry, mom. How long am I sleeping?"

"Silly you. You just hopped to bed after lunch. You just closed your eyes for about... hmmm... 10 minutes. Having dreams already?"

******

For Aia

A drop of happiness in a petal of blue,

  Reaps out the pain out of the dawn.

And the morning mist clear out this voice,

  Makes me hum a familiar melody.

As my hands start to sway, the clock start to dance,

  Ending the misery for a second or four;

Under a spell of a familiar line I bow.

  As the first minute pass, the magic blooms out through,

Unending sunlight beams out to my soul.

  Sleeping joy laughed, beamed towards the sky,

That once trapped by the darkness and pain embraced,

  Ressurected and renewed by the name of the faced who's named.

I am of a dessert sun of a leaf withered and dying.

  And to spell out your name is a phrase that is worth speaking.

Macho ka ba?

 Intro:

Sabihin nyo na na mahangin ako pero...

Ako! si Dubz... ako ay MACHO in a different way (kikiligin at ngingiti)

First stanza:
Pag sinabing MACHO... madalas tayong nakukulong sa imahe ng isang lalake na may kataasang tinding, matikas na pangangatawan at may mga sagana sa ehersisyong muscle... yung tipong nagmumura yung mga masel at nagpupumiglas palabas ng manggas ng T-shirt at nagsasabing "MASEL AKO!!!"

Chorus:

"Gnun. Sori, mpili lng tlaga en cool tlaga. Bihira ang guy na nasama sa girl sa pagbili kase matagal nga. Ang macho mo nga para skin kanina. Kala nila swit ng bf ko."


Second Stanza:
Una... Text message yan sa'kin ng isang kaibigan/kakilala na sinamahan ko sa isang mall kahapon. Kelangan nyang bumi ng damit para sa isang event na pupuntahan nya sa darating na weekend.

Pangalawa... isinama nya ako kase iba daw ang opinion ng lalake pagdating sa damit na sinosoot ng mga babae. Minsan kahit gustong gusto ng mga babae ang bumili ng damit, kukuha sila ng opinion ng iba kase mahalaga sa kanila yung anung tingin ng iba sa damit na soot nila. Saka... nag volunteer din akong sumama.

Pangatlo... hindi nya ako BF yung saleslady lang ata ang nakaisip nyan. Hahaha wala akong girlfriend.

Third Stanza
Walang kaso sa'kin ang samahan ang kaibigang babae sa pamimili ng damit sa mall. Kase nung college days, madalas akong hatakin sa mall ng isang bespren kong babae [highschool bespren] sa mall para bumili ng damit nya pag nasweldo sya. Kapalit nun, ililibre nya ako sa Tokyo Tokyo bilang pagpapasalamat [iyon talaga yung paboritong parte ko dun eh.] Ewan ko. Since di naman ako naglalalabas ng bahay, magandang pampatay ng oras yun para sa'kin.

Fourth Stanza

Hindi rin unang beses akong napuri sa pagsama sa isang kaibigang babae sa pagsama sa pamimili sa mall. Naalala ko, unang beses kong sinamahan ang isang katrabaho [na itago natin sa pangalang Maine Benitez] sa accessory kiosk ng mall sa Makati. After ilang minuto matapos nya sabihing "Ay teka lang Dubz may titingnan lang ako", at matapos ang ilang "Sorry, Dubz, ha naiinip ka na ba", nagulat ako ng sabihin nya na "Ang bait mo naman... buti 'di ka nahihiya na samahan ako no?"
"Bakit naman?" tanong ko.
"Eh kase... bihira sa lalaki ang sumama sa babae sa pagshopping"

And after nung pag tingin namin ng accessory, nasundan pa yun ng ilang beses sa mga sumunod na buwan. Leopard spots na damit, bag, Neon Green na shirt, varsity jacket, at kung anu-ano pa. Isa siguro sa mga naging dahilan 'to bakit ko sya naging close. I miss this girl so much. I'm willing to do this every day with her :D hehehe

I miss you Maine!

Refrain:

Ang senaryo: Naglalakad kami papuntang Landmark. Kelangan namin makakita ng DILAW na damit, of course, of her choice. Kwentuhan, lakad, pili, kwento, tawa. Inikot namin yung kalahati ng floor para kumuha ng mga nagustuhan nyang damit. Sabi nya sa isang sales lady:
"Miss, pwede bang umikot na muna ako tapos saka ko na lang isusukat lahat?"
"Maximum of two pieces lang ang pwede sa loob ng fitting room." bulong ko sa kanya.
"Edi dadalhin mo."

kinabahan ako.


Bridge:
Bandang huli nakapili siya ng apat na damit. Pumunta kami sa may dressing room. Kinuha ko ang bag nya ang sinukbit sa balikat ko. Dinala nya ang dalawang piraso at pumasok sa isang maliit na parang compound. Pag punta nya sa may pintuan, di pwede ang lalaki dun sa parang maliit na likuan kung san may ilang fitting room na nakalinya [MALAMANG!!!]  kaya andun ako sa may entrance nung likuan sa may corridor ng store naghintay. Lumabas siya ulit at sinabing "Pinayagan ako magdala ng 3 pieces." kinuha nya yung pangatlong damit at naiwan ako sa may corridor na may sukbit na may kalakihang shoulderbag sa kanang balikat at may hawak na damit pang babae sa kanang kamay na NAKAHANGER PA. Medyo nakakahiya ng konti kase nasa gitna ako ng isang floor na puro pangbabae ang damit, may bag, at bitbit na damit pang babae. NAPAKAINAM. Maya-maya...

"Sir!" tawag nung sales lady.

Binibigay nya sa'kin yung damit na dala nya kanina sa loob at pinapakuha daw yung huling damit na nasa akin. Balik na naman ako sa may corridor at tumayo sa parehong pwesto [meron kaseng LCD TV na malapit. Nakikinood ako. So, nakatayo ako may sukbit na bag, at may nakasampay na dilaw na damit sa kanang braso at tinitingnan ako ng mga saleslady na dumadaan at ng mga namimili na karamihan ay... oo, you're right! babae]. Maya maya lumabas na siya. Nakangiti. Nakapag decide na siya kung anung design ang bibilhin. Sinamahan ko siya ulit para isauli ang mga damit na hindi nya napili. Bago tuluyang bilhin ang napiling damit, nagtanong pa sya kung alin ang mas maganda Small or Medium ba. At parang tumakbo ang oras na masusi naming pinagusapan ang advantages at disadvantages kung pipili sya ng small or ng medium. She picked Medium.

Ad lib:

Lumabas kami ng mall na masaya kase parang kwentuhan habang namimili yung settings. Tapos natuwa siya sa'kin dahil sa sinamahan nya ako... nilibre nya ako ng salad sa Wendy's. Hay... sarap. Naaalala ko si high school bespren. Pagkatapos kumain, nagpaalam kami na uuwi na. Naghiwalay kami ng daan at sumakay ako ng bus. Habang bus, nag text ako at nagpasalamat sa salad. Sinabi kong mejo na concious ako kase napatambay ako sa harap ng fitting room tapos meron akong magandang bag at may dala akong damit na pang babae.

anong reply nya??

(Repeat Chorus 2x then fade)


Ako na macho ^_^"

A veintisiete

Pag dumadating ang January, naguumpisa na akong kabahan. Bukod kase sa New Year, andito din kase ang birthday ko. Ito rin pala yung month naospital ako hehehe.

Eksaktong isang taon ng sumulat ako ng isang maliit na note para sa pagpapasalamat sa birthday ko. Wala akong natanggap na regalo --  meron yata 'di ko maalala -- pero kelangan ko magpasalamat sa Kanya sa pagbibigay sa'kin ng isang taon pa ulit para makapagsulat nito. The past year was been so good to me. I retained my job, still have my family intact, healthy, and maganda pa rin naman ang pananaw ko sa buhay. Just seeing my relatives, friends, and people around me healthy, masayang regalo na sa'kin yun. In that note, I never prayed for any material thing. Pero kung bibigyan nyo ako ng DSLR or ng XboX walang alinlangan ko siyang tatanggapin. Kidding.

I'm never used to celebrating the day. Never celebrated it with a clown, balloons, party hats, no. Konting salo-salo lang okay na. Yun siguro yung dahilan kung bakit hindi rin ako na-'kulong' sa imahe na kapag birthday mo... may celebration. Nung highschool days, my highschool bestfriends used to celebrate birthdays with our TROPA Meal #21. Pancit Canton lang, hard boiled egg, and luncheon meat. ayun lang. kuntento na kami. I really want it to be as simple as it can be. Sabi ko nga sa mga ka work ko, "parang ordinaryong araw lang sa'kin yun" although that was really it. Ang kakaiba lang nadadagdagan ako ng taon sa araw na 'to.

It's my hatch day. And... that's it. No promises, no party hats, no clowns.
This day, you can show what you can do for me because it's my birthday...
But I can't promise to do something special for you this day...
Nothing... because I have the chance to do it EVERYDAY.

TARA! at magpakalunod sa pancit canton! Wooh!

*******

Dear Wiseguy,
Salamat sa nakalipas na taon. Oo, replay nanaman yung prayer ko hehehe sorry. Thank you for giving me a productive year. As I venture on my another 365 days -- well, ikaw lang ang nakakaalam -- give me the same courage and a little bit more patience for this everyday life. Please do bless my family, my friends, high school tropa, office mates/friends and all the people I hang out with, with this incoming "everyday".  Bless them po and make them my clue on how to walk this life better as I pleasantly continue trying to be a blessing for them.

I've been experiencing trials and test para mabawasan ang tiwala ko Sa'yo.
Bring it on! di ako natatakot... andyan Ka naman eh. The best Ka kayang kakampi. Game?

Bless me to be a good follower of You. Not my will but Yours be done.

*******

Literary - Informal [minadali para di mawala ang concept hehe]

Wala gaanong tao sa park. Mahangin. Hapon. Maraming bakanteng upuan para sa mga namamasyal. Nagpasya siyang umupo sa isa sa mga iyon para mag isip, mag muni-muni, at makipag-usap. Sa isang batibot
sa may dulo ng isang hugis tatsulok na parke; doon siya umupo.

Utility

"Dubz, di ka pa uwi?" 

nakita pala siya nang isang utility sa building kung san siya nagtatrabaho.

Dubz

"Di pa po. mag emo lang po ako saglit".

Mabilis lang din at nawala sa paligid ang taong 'yon. Mabilis sya lumakad. Ayaw abutan ng traffic.

Halos dalawang taon na din na paulit ulit siyang naglakad sa mga kalye ng lugar na 'to. Naalala din nyang nilibot niya ang buong tatlong sulok ng parkeng 'to sa unang araw nya sa trabaho para makahanap ng mabilis na daan para 'di mahuli. Pero na-late din siya.

Lalaki

"Brad... pwede makisindi?" 

isang lalaki ang lumapit sa batibot.

Dubz

"Di ako nagyo-yosi brad, eh"

Lalaki

"Alam ko. Hehehe joke lang. May lighter ako. Pwede paupo?" 

ngumiti lang si Dubz bilang pagsang-ayon. 'Ang dami dami naman lugar dito... dito pa nag yosi sa tabi ko... adik to' bulong nya sa sarili. Mahangin. May ilang hithit ng sigarilyo ang tumatama sa mukha nya pag nabuga ng usok ang lalaki.

"Uwian mo na?" 

(Sabay hithit ng sigarilyo.)

Dubz

"Ah... oo."

Lalaki

"San na yung mga kasama mo?"

Dubz

"Alin... sino?" 

Lalaki

"Yung mga kasabay mo umuuwi galing trabaho."

Dubz

"Wala na... nalipat ako ng departamento. Di ko na sila kasama. Teka kilala ba kita?" 

Lalaki

"Kilala kita, oo. Pero ikaw 'di mo ako kilala. Dun ka nagtatrabaho di'ba?"

(Sabay turo sa kalapit na building)

Dubz

Oo, pano mo nalaman?

Lalaki

Kase nga kilala kita.

Dubz

Office mate ba kita?

Lalaki

Hindi. Alam ba ng mga office mate mo na nanalo ka ng award sa literary contest nung college ka?

Dubz

Classmate ba kita nung college?

Lalaki

Hindi no, mas matagal pa kitang kilala... hindi lang college.

(Natahimik sila pareho. Tumayo si Dubz at nagpaalam na aalis na pero...)

Lalaki

Pinatingnan mo na ba yang sakit ng dibdib mo? Bakit ba natatakot kang ipatingin yan?

Dubz

Yun ang nakakapagtaka dun. Tama na! sino ka ba pano mo nalaman yan?

Lalaki

Ikaw.

Dubz

Anung Ikaw?

Lalaki

Ako, ikaw. Wag kang magalala ilang minuto na lang aalis na ako. May gusto lang akong mapatunayan sa'yo.

Dubz

Adik ka ba??

Lalaki

Naging mabuti ka bang 'Dubz' nitong nakalipas na taon?

Dubz

Ako sa sarili ko alam ko naging mabuti ako... yata. 'Di ko sure. Pero... Oo!

Lalaki

Gaya ka pa din ng dati. Wag ka mag alala... ako na nagsasabi: naging Maayos kang 'Dubz' nitong taon na 'to.

Dubz

Maayos? hindi mabuti?

Lalaki

Maayos. May nagawa ka ring kabulastugan no. Hind TAYO perpektong tao.

Dubz

Tayo??

Lalaki

Aalis na ako ^_^" Naging mabuti ang nakalipas na taon sa'yo. Ilang oras lang iiwan na kita at ikaw... ikaw mismo na kausap ko, ang gagawa ng panibagong AKO para sa taon na 'to. Subukan mo pang maging mas mabuti sa kung anong ginawa MO sa'kin sa nakalipas na taon, okay?

Dubz

Aalis? babalik ka pa ba?

Lalaki

Hindi na no... lipas na ako. Ilang oras nalang lilipas na yung taon ko. Pag gising mo, panibagong taon na ulit.  Gawin mo lang kung anong pinaniniwalaan nating tama. Ingatan mo lagi sarili mo at wag bibitawan yung mga taong nagiging dahilan ng pag gising mo sa araw-araw.

Dubz

...

Lalaki

Inspired ka no?

Dubz

Oo naman. Si Ver... teka! kung ako ikaw, dapat alam mo yan di'ba?

Lalaki

Hehe, oo naman. Happy birthday.

Dubz

...

Lalaki

Happy birthday sa'tin.

Dubz

Salamat 2011

Lalaki

...

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

Formal Essay [Part 2] [How Can You Change People's First Impression]

January 4, 2012

Wala na naman kaming file. So, we're instructed [again, again]
Essay ulit... 1000 words... English.
Walanjo talaga naman I made ubos na my reserbang English.
Pero I should say, hindi ako nakakagawa ng essay madalas... lahat sa school. And kahit maraming mali ang isang  'to, I'm kinda proud of this one. I made my point here... yata.

Inuulit ko... redundant nayung iba kase pinilit ko na lang palawakin yung article.


*******

How Can You Change People's First Impression


               We are the character of ourselves once we show a smile to other person or shake their hand for the very first time. It is like selling a good representation to others that would last maybe an entire time. A research says that a person makes eleven different decisions in the first seven seconds of meeting. Seven seconds is what we just need.

When making new acquaintances, first impression would be a great consideration. By here, people will mark you on what characteristics you are exhibiting, but not your personality. That's why wrong impressions often happens. Most of the time, individuals who has a strong rapport to people, the one who smiles, and the one who makes the “you-are-welcome” expression has the chance of being approached by many or regularly. That is also how endorsers sells a lot of product in any media. One must create a delightful presentation or exhibition of an object or a person to the masses to make a product appealing and laudable to the consumer's eyes.

Its mediocrity has been regularly exercised, but rarely, not many are to disregard the first impression that has been lurking inside their thoughts. Very few are those who are to delve deep over the first impression that they have attached to a thing or an individual. Some people practice individuality nowadays; they tend to swerve away from the usual likings and norms of a common people. and having a decent front can be practiced to be used in necessary circumstances such as public relation activities, interviews or employment. Thus, first impression may not be a good thing at times. We can easily isolate a person that are of not the same kind or do not belong to a group, we could identify a person by his education or just simply point out an educated person that has no discipline.

First impressions are just a temporary identification card, if I may, for each individual. Unless there's a need of confidence or self-esteem in a situation, I present myself confident and able. But for the everyday living, I keep myself silent and more of a listener. It is not to give an impression to someone that I am cold or dull, it is just the way I want to show others who I truly am. Though, the truth is, I am a lot more silent and listening is all I am enjoy doing above all. Others find that boring... and so was I at some of the times. On freshmen years, I was mistaken to be braggy, arrogant, and a rascal because of the way I stare. And I had proven them wrong.

People's first impression last even we had proven it wrong as it goes. Though some  impression may be  a complete opposite of what we really are, any individual would tell us saying that this was it like when they saw us, they heard us, and talked to us.  There would be no fast way of changing our first registration to people; at any rate, there is no better way of doing so other than if they do want to know us. There are some who knew themselves very well who really don't show who they are; impressions are all we can bind to that person, and impression is all that is left for us to ponder. People would have to see the everyday us to prove or to reject what they believe who we are. There would be no hastened way of doing this so it would take more patience and determination if one wants to know the real them.

We could not be greater or less then who we believe we are. If we got the attention of somebody, just stick with it; just make sure that we act what is necessary and according to our age. Mess around and ask an apology if that would be a grievance to someone; do good and try to be consistent.

Individuals who knew us for a petty amount of time might know us the way we have shown them. They would hold on to that idea on how they build a miniature us inside their heads. They would not believe a bit of kindness or a pound of anger we would display because all that are running in their mind is the miniscule representation of us... when they first tried to know us. Just do what we believe is right, just do what we believe is punctual. Right things are the only actions we should always do and we will do that with no instruction from no one.

It is not an obligation to act or move the way the masses want us to be. It is not a responsibility to act or move the way the community would like us to do; the fad, the trends, because in the first place, we are being a phoney; a mere pretender. Just act your years and act good. Individuals who eventually know us would be enlightened bit by bit when they take the responsibility to understand us. One might know us for being vague; let them be. Just be what we really are, what we really want to be. Let us just have a steadfast statement of what we really are and what are our thoughts about, and eventually, they would prove themselves wrong. Let them know the good or the more goodness in us because it is what that really matter. Prove to them that what little they know about a person would be just a granule of a unsolicited part of the whole. A wholeness of a good or a greater; of bad or the worst.

Practice to be ourselves at all times. It would be very uneasy for us to move according to what other people know of who we are. Act out what you wanted to be, but do it responsibly and according to the norms and the disciplined way the society accepts it. A first impression clinging in our name and our person would be a great tool on how people can understand us. If an individual put a bad mark onto our forehead, we can do things to make them see we are better; if they put a good mark onto our forehead, we can still tell them “it is not our best.” And it would take seven seconds or a lifetime.

Formal Essay [Daw] [Kuno]

January 3, 2012.

Wala kaming file. So, we're instructed [again] to do other things. And it's an essay now. Not less than 2000 words and articles are not included. English. Wow... hindi ko talaga naseryoso ang pag aaral ng English sa totoo lang so kung hindi ko sineryoso ang aralin na 'yon, anung aasahan mo sa'kin pag nagbasa ka ng katha ko na puro English?

Handa ka na magbasa ng boring pero comedy na essay?
Warning: Sakit ko din ang maglagay ng punctuation marks... huminga at huminto kung sa tingin mo ay kailangan ng tuldok at nakalimutan ko lagyan.


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The Next Six Months

I have been in this company for a year and eight months now. Quite a long period for a Philippine employee you may say. Working on some selection of jobs, I might consider my current employment to be a more decent one. It is great to work on a high-rise bulding in the middle of the business district of the country (20 floors to state – I am on the 18th). Everyday, I had to track my way in a "always-busy" roads of Makati. Yes, Makati. I don't know, but some of my colleagues in school, highschool or college,  have this distinct expression of when you are working on the business central, you get this high regard while  working there. It is just the name of the place, it does not deal anything with the kind of work; Makati has street sweepers too just so you know. I maybe working on a well-known place where business tycoon rule, foreign investor meets, ambassadors live,  and a district mostly owned by a person whose the main avenue was named from, but it does not make me one so one does not need to praise or throw extolments just I am with Makati, I hate that. I am no extraordinaire from an employee from Muntinlupa with the same job and the same paycheck... I'm just a bit farther from home.

        In that almost two years, I have this chance to wander and explore the place, but I was not able to. In fact, I still walk my way to work in the very same route I took when I applied in this job. I lack in place memorization that would be why. Leave me blindfolded in the middle of    Makati Avenue and I will just look on the familiar buildings and look my way around. I am not familiar with the name of the streets, intersection, and establishments.  Needless to say, I still track the same way going home. Yes, the chain of malls: Greenbelt, Landmark, SM.  There is this faster way, when you trail and walk along Ayala Avenue going to EDSA "outside" the mall. I was introduced on the bars and the stores inside that cluster of  malls – appreciate the food and the landscaping. And being as a frustrated photographer, Ayala Avenue would be a great place especially when there is no people lurking in it. I love the avenue when we are in holidays. I could have a digital camera and take a shot of something. Actually, that is one side of the work that I really look after... It is a pleasure – or a work outside of work. Makati is not all about business, not all about work. Makati has a soft place for everyone... each and any person of any kind. Makati in it's cleanest roads have dirty spots too specially at night.

        I have done those things and countless more having the job here. What are in store  for this year is yet to be explored, yet no one knows what would it be. For this next months, life in the disctrict  seems the same. They do not know anything about what's not about business and work matter still matters to whom who needs it and to the ones who are providing it. I would move what my job wants me to do, and I would do it for it is how I am measured. Though I would be doing  the same things  that I generally do or do something more... memorize a new street name maybe.

        There has been a lot of changes in the workplace. It was never like  it was before. This only reminds us that the workplace is not a playground, it is a professional place. It is a place where you work your tissues out to earn. The fun is just second. I have been in three departments or "project", as they call it, of this company. The first project and my current project would be the most commendable – we only lasted for two weeks in the second project before we finally end up in transcribing legal proceedings. We have been transcribing legal procedures for eight months now and it has been a topsy turvy shift from my first project. We transcribe pre-recorded audio call in my first project. It was hard, yes, but legal transcribing is a complete different story. "Transcribing with a sting", it is the way I described it before. "May kurot! Ang sakit eh!" I used to utter. I have to understand all the rules of it, the style of it, the nature of it, and put yourself into it. It is fun though. No, it is hard, really. We were not that familiar with the culture, the accent, the law, and some stuff. "One and a half months of training will not suffice." I remember one of my trainers told us that, but eventually, getting the hang of it, we were  able to join the others who had been there first... well, at least slightly. Say hello to Mr. Shapiro. I remembered handling my very first live file was with him. So, in the near future, when I have to pursue another career out of this company, Adam (Shapiro) would be one great keyword for me to remember the work. I never thought of hanging for this long in this field. I used to say that legal terms and stuff are not for me. But we were chosen to do this. I will just convince myself that there were reason that we were picked from others and we are capable of doing this job.
       
        It has been like that and I think that it would be the same. The workload, the work shifts, the report, statistics, target, incentives, coaching, but not the workplace. Like on the last department where I came from, I used to miss some person that I used to get along for almost a year. One by one, almost monthly, I had to say farewell on some of the people I used to chat with and have lunch with. One part of doing work is doing it with your close companions. And watching them left and go by the day  is the real sting while working in an environment where you are a complete different person while doing the job. It's nice to see that people try to put efforts in making the field a happy place to work and not everybody do that. But you have to go through and continue. Workplace is no place for fun and recreation... it's a professional place.

        In the following months, more people will try to leave and hopefully, same amount will come. Doing the job like I have is not an easy task. More rules to follow, more mistakes to look out. It would take a month and a half training for a newcomer to fully understand or get a glimpse of what we're doing. We're still peeping. But, as an employee, you don't have to to give much attention to the loss, you have to gain; for the company, for yourself.  You are not paid of what you think about the job; neither your opinions on how the system go. You are to move on what you have to do... you are part of the system, it is your job; it is all about you after all. You are in the frontline in the field and what you will do on the ground makes a blot on the name of the institution you represent.

        Walking on the same road and walking home at the same path is what seems I would be doing in the following days. Hit the traffic jam, pile up in the streets for a ride, bump on someone on the bus, standing on a homebound trip in the midst of a storm surge, get to the office, do your stuff, collect your paycheck, and wakeup for another work day. That seem to be the most likely scenario unless there are changes. Together with the "changes" this management told that they will induce, one should be ready for those changes and I hope the changes are good. Many of which who do this job with me seeks for a better compensation from the company... everybody does. And as these changes rolls out, the sake of the employees should be given focus too.

         I have been in the legal transcription business for months now, but it feels like I don't still get the hang of it. I'm still have to convince myself that I have done this, and I have done this correctly. In the following weeks, the first three months I may say, would be crucial. Most of the cases and proceedings would be pouring out again from a Florida based client. We transcribe, we earn.  There are events that is coming ahead this quarter. There are some celebrations, events, and public engagements that will come to slightly help on what kind of employee you are showing now.    Together with the weight of this job, one must at least try to observe these occassions. In the past months, I experienced how to be trained and be the newcomer in this field. In the following months, there were some that would replace our post... we will be the one who will assist, less the assisted.


        I was asked by a very close relative to try and venture outside of the country. It was a big thing, the sound of it still screeching in my head numerous times within the day. There is so much to consider when doing a job overseas for I value relationship ties too much. And that close relative said, "Son, that's what I said when I am thinking of a decision. You will have to be wise nowadays, you know?" In a couple of months, he would be coming back here and settle for good. He is waiting for an answer, six months would be enough to think. People said that working in the country would not bring you anywhere. Some of the times, we might believe that and part of the times, we have to consider obliging ourselves that it's not the solution. Up to this point, I am still obliging myself.

        I have this dedication on everything I do. I make sure that I do what I am asked with passion and dedication. I am not doing a perfect job... many of us neither. I have this longing to do and perfect the craft where I am now... I could; what I could not clearly tell is "until when?" I do not want to end up searching for another adventure leaving the last one unfinished. I would like to make something out of this while I am thinking about the offer. If time permits me so, I'll do great in this career and make the overseas work wait. Six months would be enough to prove myself that I can do this and I can do great on this. The workflow --  the pattern seems the same everyday. What I can do is to change the way I look at my targets and be productive than my normal self would; that would be a clear change.  I would like to know how this business roll out and I would like to know the branches of these job more.  I would like to learn more on how to do somebody's job; those ones who is ahead of us, for us to know what to be like guiding the ones like where I am now. In the following months, one might not know all what he yearn, but at least understand some. The challenge is still on.

        I have been in this company for a year and eight months now.  There's more file to do, more time to practice, and more chances to convince myself that I know what I'm doing. And the challenge is still on. Loads of articles, evidences, exhibits, bunch of new attorneys, bunch of new company names, and  lot more cases. All comes in the next couple of months ahead. This might be a good preparation on what I really look upon on doing; a practice if I may. Once I can tell myself that I can do this job, I can call it challenge done.


*******

[nosebleed *singhot]
Dahil kelangan namin tapusin ang essay sa loob ng isang shift, may pagka redundant na yung ibang linya.
Hahaha gulpi ako nito sa mga English major dyan.
Andyan ang comment box, malaya kayo pumuna hehehe.